I can tuck mytits in my pants
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
