It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize