So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
