so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
