Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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