Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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