Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
