We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
