Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
