Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
you inspire me to be a worse person
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
