oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize