I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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