going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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