Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
