she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I understand Curling. That high.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
