no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
