Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize