people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize