I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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