I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
