3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
