when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
