I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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