Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Two words: nipple clamps
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