Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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