so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
