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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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