I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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