wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
