did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
