its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
