I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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