my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
