Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
