what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
