I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You're a waste of cheezeits
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
