somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
