there was a trapeze. enough said
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
