you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
