I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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