That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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