i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
our cab driver is having phone sex.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
