How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
