no. you can't hotbox the world.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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