my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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