I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
