What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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