The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
