can we get nightvision for the apartment?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
