it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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