Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
